Time to catch up!

 Whew. I can finally breathe. What a busy couple of months it has been! 

For those of you who didn't already know. Kyle was allowed to come home for 30 days. He was home for almost the entire month of July. We finally had our beautiful wedding and he was even here for my birthday! Perfect timing.

There is a lot for me to talk about. So, I'll just start from the beginning.

Kyle came home June 27th. Many people thought he just got 30 days off, but that isn't exactly how RA (recruiter's assistance) works. Kyle came home because his training was postponed due to not enough trainers/teachers to lead Kyle's classes. Kyle was in Virginia for an entire month basically not doing anything but PT (physical training/working out) every now and then. So, his superiors finally gained some brain cells and decided to allow Kyle's platoon to have RA. They could only have 30 days. Kyle and I planned it so that it would give me at least 1 month to plan a wedding (more on that later). So, Kyle came home and was off on the weekends. He reported in Monday morning and learned that his job every day was to gather referrals (guys/girls ages 17-20 are ideal) for the recruiters to call and schedule interviews to see if they're interested in joining the Marines. Basically- Kyle is the guy who walks out on the lot when you're looking at new cars. He talks you into buying the new car, and instead of doing paper work and all the financial aspects of buying a new car, he sends you to his boss who takes care of that. Does that make sense? He actually did really well! He was to get 2 referrals a day, which sounds really difficult. But, when you're Kyle and you have the personality of a bulldog (a sweet, but stern bull dog) you're pretty much set. And, luckily for Kyle, the recruiter he worked under in Carrollton was incredible and allowed him to leave early if he had his 2 referrals for the day. Kyle, being the smart man that he is, had a brilliant idea. About 3 nights a week Kyle would go to Walmart, or any other shopping center and be a car salesman. We all know teenagers like to hang out at shopping centers at night. Prime time for Kyle to work his magic. He would get his 2 referrals, go home, go to work the next morning, turn the referrals in, and basically be done by lunch time. I was SO thankful for that.

Enough about Kyle and his harassing talents.

I PLANNED (and succeeded in planning) A WEDDING IN 38 DAYS!

Yeah, I said that right. I can't believe it myself to be honest. It was a pretty difficult process. Lots of tears and headaches, and some arguments. But, all in all, it was a beautiful day. Luckily, I already had a very good idea of what I wanted - flowers, venue, photographer, already had my wedding gown, catering was pretty easy to narrow down. The "bigger" things were taken care of. I went straight to etsy.com for all of the behind the scenes stuff.

Things I bought on etsy.com for the wedding:

garters
wedding cake topper
flower girl dresses
flower girl's gifts (personalized pearl bracelets)
Drake's bow tie
the robe I wore as I got ready
wedding koozies (favors)
a plaque I used as decoration

And everything turned out incredible. The flower girl dresses even came from Finland! How cool?! The koozies were a hit with everyone, as was Drake's bow tie collar. The cake topper matched the cake perfectly, and the garters... OMG. Precious. Kyle got a kick out of them. The robe is precious. I've worn it a few times since the wedding as I get out of the shower and get ready. The plaque I bought will definitely be used in our future home. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I'm pretty impressed with how quickly me (with the help of my mom, sister in law, and friends) pulled this wedding off. So, TOOT, TOOT. 

*If you have any questions regarding our wedding - any questions at all, please feel free to ask.*


I really feel married now. We were legally married March 13th of this year, but it didn't really sink in until our wedding had taken place. We never said our vows the day we got legally married, so I think that is probably why. I have my wedding band, and I have a new last name - that I haven't legally changed yet... I'm procrastinating that. I'm so excited to truly call Kyle my husband now. It's one of the best feelings in the world, to be married. That probably sounds strange. But, to know how loved you are by someone other than your mom, dad, etc. feels so incredible. And to love someone with every fiber of your being! I seriously cannot explain it.

With every hello, there has to be a goodbye. And, it was really hard to do. Kyle left to go back to Virginia last Sunday (July 28th). Our plan was to try to get me to go through security with Kyle so that we could seriously cherish every last moment we had before he got on the plane. We were told by a few that they would allow it for military families, and we were told they wouldn't allow it, period. Can't hurt to ask. So, we did. And, it is true- only for military families. I got a gate pass, had to show my military ID, went through security, and spend about another 30 minutes with Kyle. We were both a mess. But, we're pretty used to separation more than we're used to being together. Plus, we know when we'll see each other again and we're SO very excited for that date to finally get here.

I really feel like I soaked up every moment I was with Kyle. We cannot wait until Labor Day weekend! (that's the next time we'll see each other, if you hadn't already figured that out.)


P.S: Not sure if you noticed or not, but, I had to change the name of my blog again. I was searching through military spouses blogs and found one that had the same as my old one (the ramblings of a marine wife). So, I searched "married to the marines" and luckily, it wasn't taken!

turning a page

Each year as Father's Day emerges, this grey cloud sort of follows me around. I become irritated quickly and just all around gloomy.

My relationship with my dad has always been a roller coaster. When I was in middle school/high school it was an okay relationship - we'd talk, I'd go see him on the occasional weekend, etc. Then, as I got older, things about my parent's divorce became clearer to me and I began to try to figure my dad out... which was a huge mistake. I wanted to understand why he did the things that he did, why he left Jeremy and I. Okay, so you're not happy with your marriage, but why punish your kids for that? I never could figure that out - until I realized that it wasn't me, it wasn't anything that I had done, and I couldn't change him or the way he behaves.

So, I got over it - it took me a couple of years, but I got over it. With a few counseling sessions, lots of tears, and the unconditional love that Kyle gave me when he came into my life, I started to understand things a little more.

Believe it or not, I started to understand my dad more. I realized there was a lot of immaturity within him that he will probably never be rid of. Don't get me wrong, my dad is smart. Probably one of the smartest men I know - but not when it comes to life lessons. And that's okay. I'm not angry at him for that. Like I said, I'm past it. I'm past the hurt. And, I love my dad... I always will.

But (of course there is a "but"), Father's Day isn't a good day for me. It isn't a day that I click my heels together from excitement. I don't go to church on Father's Day - I did this a few years ago, and I'll never do it again. I try to stay off of social media to avoid seeing people's pictures of them with their dad. I basically make a sorry attempt at pretending the day isn't honoring Fathers.

Yesterday, I called my dad. We casually talked - nothing monumental happened. I actually think he was shocked that I called. And that was my Father's Day... or so I thought.

Kyle's grandparents invited me to come down to their house and have a late lunch and go fishing in their catfish pond on their farm. Their house/farm is one of my favorite places to be. It's the epitome of tranquil. It's also where we shot our engagement pictures. :)

So, I went, hesitantly. Like I said, I didn't want to even acknowledge the day. But, how can I turn down Kyle's sweet grandparents? Exactly, I can't. I got down there, we ate sandwiches and chips, drank cold sweet tea, and Mawmaw's heavenly peach cobbler. Then, as the heat began to calm down, we went down to the pond and sat in some patio chairs while Kyle's sister, her husband, and their 2 kids caught a dozen+ catfish (I caught one as well). I sat beside Kyle's pawpaw as he cracked jokes left and right. We laughed so much. At one point I caught myself laughing my extremely loud laugh, that hasn't come out in a while. It was nice to let lose and actually enjoy Father's Day for once.

I realized after I left how much I really didn't want to go down there to begin with - but how glad I was that I did. It's so nice to see yourself make improvements over time.

Kyle's sweet Pawpaw and I sitting on the back of Kyle's old Toyota. We were coming back from the pond.

My 1lb. catfish! I was pretty excited. :)

time for a confession

Up until about a year ago, I could eat what I wanted, as much as I wanted. Oddly enough, when Kyle entered basic training I began to gain weight. I didn't gain much in the 3 months he was away, but since he has been home I feel like I have gained 20 pounds. When I stepped on the scale (a.k.a the devil) Friday morning, I got a wake up call.

It read: 161 lbs. 

One hundred and sixty one pounds?!

I wanted to cry and scream at the same time. I was/am so angry at myself for letting my body get the way it is. I immediately went to Pinterest and looked at my "Fitness" board to see what I could start doing that wasn't completely unrealistic.

Back in July/August of last year I started doing the Insanity program. It gave me energy, made me feel good, didn't necessarily made me lose weight, but I wasn't necessarily trying to lose weight. I just wanted to get toned and more fit. Then I had my appendectomy and wasn't really able to work out comfortably for about 2 weeks. After that, I never started it again.

Damn appendix. 

I think my biggest motivation is this: the other day I was reading an article in Cosmopolitan magazine. It was about women who struggle with the thought of infertility. It read that 87% of women ages 18-30 (I think) fear they will have fertility problems when they start trying to have children. It had a section at the end that talked about what women (and their partners) can do to help prevent infertility. The one that stood out: eat healthy. 

And, well, let me be honest: I really like french fries and chicken nuggets from Wendy's. It's my weakness.

So, when I read those two words I told myself, "Self, we gotta have a chat." Then I gave myself a pep talk and decided that it was time to start doing better. I'm 22 almost 23 and I put some of the nastiest, greasiest foods in my body. I realized I was doing so much harm to my body. Then I apologized to my body. 

I'm not 125 lbs. anymore like I was in high school. My thighs touch (which I don't really have a problem with), my butt wobbles, my arms even have a little jiggle to them. But my belly. UGH. When I get naked at night to take a bath and look at myself in the mirror, I can't even look at my belly. My stomach was as flat as a piece of paper in high school, even in my first couple of years of college. I won't lie, I was almost sickly looking in high school. I'm glad I have meat on my bones now... but I have too much meat.

I'm not comfortable with being 20 lbs. heavier than my husband. In my defense, Kyle is like 5'7'' and works out. So, that's one reason he's only 135-140 lbs. Not to mention he can go all day and only eat 1 meal. I swear he is from another universe.

So, operation lost 10-15 lbs. began this morning with a mile walk through the Little Tallapoosa Park about 1/2 mile away from my house. I drank a breakfast shake this morning and then ate a good lunch and dinner. I have my Camelback water bottle that holds about 20 oz. of water. I plan on trying to drink at least 4 full bottles a day. I plan on doing an ab workout and an arm workout every day, and walking/running every day as well. Those are my main target areas right now, and where I see the most weight/fat has gone in the past few months.

Fruits, veggies, and 100 calorie snacks are going to be a part of my every day diet. I'm sure there will be a time that I want to go through the red headed freckled face girl's drive thru (Wendy's), but I'm going to remind myself of my goals and try to keep my eye on the prize.

a strange realization

Each year, as Memorial Day or Veterans Day passes by, I always think about the families that those days actually apply to. When my Pawpaw was still alive, we would honor him on Veterans Day, but other than that, we never had any family or friends that had served or were serving, much less someone who had been killed serving our country.

So, as yesterday came and went, I was in constant reminder of how those holidays apply to me now. I am a spouse to a Marine. I am a military wife. 

*Let me just say, it's really weird saying that.*

I don't think the "military wife" realization has hit me quite yet. With Kyle being several states away and us not living together, I don't even feel married. I'm sure once he is stationed and I am with him, experiencing military life daily, that feeling will change. 

I'm very honored to be married to a United States Marine - one of the few and the proud. It's an honor that I never, and I mean never thought that I would have. If someone had asked me 5 years ago who I imagined spending my life with, where we would be living, what our careers would be... none of my answers would have involved the military. Quite honestly, I never thought I would marry someone like Kyle. He pushes me to become a better person. He challenges me in ways I don't like to be challenged. I still wonder why he ever gave me a chance.

Now and forevermore, I will feel a stronger connection to Memorial Day, Veterans Day, and even July 4th. The stars and stripes mean so much more to me than I ever thought they would.

A walk in my shoes

I've know I've only been a "Marine Wife" for almost 3 months now, so I know what I am about to type is going to cause some eye rolling. Oh well.

I have been on this military journey with Kyle since February of 2012. He signed his enlistment papers July 13, 2012 and left for Basic Training December 10, 2012. Since December 10, 2012, I have seen my now husband probably a total of 14 days- counting the 2 days we saw him for basic training graduation, the 10 days he was home for leave, and the 1 1/2 days I saw him last month when I went to visit him in North Carolina. Almost 6 months have passed and I've seen him a total of 14 days.

So, though I've only been a "Marine Wife" for 3 months, I know a thing or two about separation from a loved one.

Here are a few things that become that much more special when your better half is away: 

*Phone calls: when Kyle's picture comes up on my phone, no matter if I just talked to him 5 minutes prior, I get excited. Hearing his voice is all I have. It's the best connection we have. The duration of the calls may only be 2 minutes, or they could be a long, good talk that lasts 30 minutes. Nevertheless, each call is vital to our daily routine. I don't feel like my day has ended well if I haven't spoken with him.

*Texts: little texts throughout the day can instantly change my entire mood for the day. I'll never forget the first time Kyle was able to text me during the day. I had my phone in my hand, sitting on the couch and my text tone went off. I looked down and it said, "Kyle ICE" (ICE meaning, "in case of emergency"....it's always good to be proactive and let emergency personnel know who to contact). I was immediately overwhelmed with excitement. I quickly text him back, because I knew that he was only able to cut his phone off for maybe 1 minute to send me that text, but I wanted him to get one from me, too.

*Pictures/Facetime: I'll text Kyle sometimes and tell him to send me a picture of him, and when asks why (he hates taking pictures) I will say, "Because I want one, duh." I like to see him every now and then, to know he is okay, even though he is texting/calling me, it's nice to actually see him. I try to send him a picture every day, but sometimes the pictures feel like a broken record: picture of me smiling, picture of Drake doing something stupid, picture of me making Drake take a picture with me, picture of something I'm eating, etc. Facetime is one of the best inventions ever. It's just like Skype, but for the iPhone. Unfortunately, we're not able to Facetime every day because it requires you to be conntected to wifi, and 9 times out of 10, Kyle isn't connected to wifi. So, when we are able to Facetime, it's AWESOME.

Here are some things that really suck about being a military wife:

*Not ever really knowing if Kyle is OK: Yeah, he'll send me a good morning text every morning, and typically call me at night for a few minutes. But, throughout the day, I have no idea what he does, where he is, how to get in touch with him. Nothing. I envy those of you who get to check in with your better half throughout the day to just say, "Hey!"

*Not being able to make a schedule: Throw control out the window. If you're OCD and need to always be in charge of your life. You couldn't be a military spouse. Well, you could... but you'd have to let go of A LOT of things in your life. We're never in control of our future. We never know when we'll see each other again or where he is going next. Ever. I'm sure you could say, "Yeah, after I get off work I'm going to go by the grocery store and pick up some things to make dinner. So, I should be home by about 5:30. Will you be home when I get there?" You'll probably get a response like, "Yeah, honey. I'll be there." Even once Kyle is stationed somewhere and I'm with him... I will probably never know when he will be home. There will probably be days when he won't even know if he'll be coming home.

*Being lonely: Lonesomeness haunts me sometimes. It lingers over me like a shadow. It hurts. I find myself saying, "I wish...." a lot. I wish I was with Kyle. I wish Kyle was here. I wish Kyle had our own place. I wish Kyle weren't so far away. Loneliness wouldn't be so tough if I knew when I would see Kyle again. It would give me a count down- something to look forward to.

Being a military newlywed is probably one of the hardest things I've ever done. Since Kyle and I got married, we've seen each other a total of 6 days. It's been excruciatingly difficult for both of us to be away from each other. I'd give anything if I could just spend one day out of the month with Kyle.

So, the next time you catch yourself thinking, "Gosh, I wish I just had one day to myself." Think about the military wives/husbands who spend about 9 months to a year by themselves because their spouse is deployed overseas. Never take the love you have for your better half for granted. Never skip out on a chance to hold their hand, put your arm around them, kiss them, hug them, etc. There are so many people in the world who would give up everything they had in order to just spend a few hours with their husband/wife. Be grateful - and always count your blessings.

the best snack in the 90's

Anyone remember Dunkaroos? Let me refresh your memory:

Remember? If not, you truly missed out during your childhood. I can no longer find these bad boys anywhere. I don't know if they stopped making them or what. Maybe they're only available in certain states... who knows. They were delicious though. When searching for this image, I clicked the source for the image by accident and stumbled across Ebay. So, I guess people are buying them somewhere if they're selling them online.

Well, a friend of mine on Facebook somehow came across a recipe for the "dip" you dip the cookies in. She shared it on Facebook the other day and I was so curious I went out and bought the ingredients that day. So, I shall share it with you.

I bought the following. I'm a little bit cheap and went with the Publix brand instead of buying Cool Whip for like $3 or $4, Yoplait yogurt for probably $3-$5 and the better brand of animal crackers for probably $2-4. I bought everything for under $8.

All I did was put the cake mix, whipped topping, and plain yogurt into a medium to large size mixing bowl and stir until it seemed to be blended fairly well. It seriously took like 3-4 minutes for me to do. I used the whole tub of whipped cream and the whole box of cake mix. I didn't use the entire tub of yogurt. I didn't realize how disgusting plain yogurt is. I only put about 1 1/2 cups in the bowl. I think my friend used 2 cups, but I couldn't stomach the bitter taste it left in my mouth. The yogurt sort of counteracts the sweet taste of the cake mix and the whipped cream, so I understand why that is a part of the ingredients.

This is what the dip looked liked after I mixed it all together. 

 

 

 

 

So, my review. From what I can remember, this tastes almost exactly like Dunkaroos. I haven't had them in a long time, but I do remember how much I loved them. Mom didn't buy them very often because, well, lets face it: vanilla frosting and graham cookies isn't exactly the healthiest snack. You could switch it up and dip apples in it, I suppose.

So, if you're in the mood for a sweet, easy-to-make snack, this does the trick pretty well.

Dunkaroos lives on, folks.

Oh baby, baby

Kyle and I were talking about baby names last night on the phone. My brother and sister in law are pregnant with their first child and have been talking about baby names for a while now. I told Kyle what the girl's name will be, but I'm not sure if they've decided on a boy's name. Kyle said he thinks Allison (my sister in law) is going to have a girl... I still have no idea what makes him think that. He said he's psychic. ;) None of us care what it will be as long as he/she is healthy. We're just so excited to add to our (small) family!

After Kyle and I talked, I got to thinking about baby names and what I would want to name our child (one day). He said Ruthie Mae... I just laughed. He was kidding, thank God.

I like these names for girls (in no particular order):
Lydia
Sophia (call her Sophie)
Anna
Hallie (this name could be the victim of problem #2- see below)
Hannah

I like these names for boys (in no particular order):
Samuel (call him Sam)
Benjamin (call him Ben)
Ian
Will
Gavin

 Here is my checklist for naming my (future) child:

1. The name cannot remind me of anyone I don't like. I don't want to call my kid's name and have some douche bag's face in the back of my head. I know that my child will be able to provide a new definition of that name for me. But, I still wouldn't name he or she the same name as my ex(es), Kyle's ex, or any of our not-so-favorite-people.

2. The name cannot be difficult to pronounce. My child is going to be in school for 12+ years. I'm not going to choose some ridiculous name that their teacher or classmates can't pronounce. Like Kira... is it Ke-ee-ra or Ky-yy-ra? And no matter how many times they tell someone how to pronounce it, that someone will (9 times out of 10) say it the opposite way. I had a friend in college whose name is Kyra and she had this problem in our classes.

3. The name cannot be difficult to spell. Sometimes, the spelling of one's name can be a do or die situation. When your child is going through testing time in school and they have an answer sheet or booklet with their name, and oops! There is a random "e" on the end of their name- that could screw them up. Or, you decided to be super duper creative and spell your child's name "Marq" instead of "Mark". You're not creative, you're just weird... and you just made your child's life very, very difficult. Names that end with the "ey" or "ie" sound ALWAYS get spelled differently. Kellie, Kelly, Kelley. See where I'm going with this?

While I'm on the spelling of names... my name is spelled RachEL, people. Not Racheal or Rachael. People on Facebook misspell my name. It's Facebook, for crying out loud! My name is RIGHT there for it to be spelled correctly. This is a pet peeve of mine. Can you tell?

4. The name cannot be turned into a horrible nickname. Name your child Jack and I guarantee you he will be called "Jack off" one day. This really needs no further explanation.

 I don't plan on having children for a few years, but when I do, I'll have a pretty good idea as to what their name will be... which I've heard is a pretty difficult decision for some couples. I'm glad Kyle and agree on... most everything. :)